Christmas with autism

Was entertaining.
Gabe was the first to open anything. It was an action link set for toy story. Goes with the sets he already has, you attach them and they do a domino effect. He loves them, cause they do things and even better are toy story.
He opens it, smiles and runs to the playroom. I could see him from the sofa the whole time as he shreds the box and sets up the toy with the others that match it. He is in there for about 20 min.
Suddenly Gabe rejoins us in the living room, dives UNDER the tree and digs out another box that is the same shape and size of the first. Smiles again, not looking at anyone, rips it open and takes off to the play room again. We didn't see him for almost an hour this time!
Deze just wanted to tear it all open, no matter the name on the gift, and she didn't slow down to see what anything was unless we made her. We make them all open things one at a time to help relieve the stress of it. And we also take breaks while opening gifts for cleaning up so the clutter is not over whelming.
Deze stripped off her clothes several times during gift opening. She pulled down the tree at one point, was eating gift wrap at another.
But when she opened up her new bath toys...she stripped and went for the tub! Not a word from her, I caught up with her as she was turning on the straight hot water. For a fat lady I can haul ass when one of my kids needs me to!
We tried hard to make it as stress free as we could. Still ended up with more meltdowns then I ever want to admit, but such is life in a house with 2 kids with autism!

People suck

No, not all people, but some. Lots of people express that they feel that Gabe and Deze are VERY high functioning. I really wish those people could experience my life for one day. Just one is all it would take to make it crystal clear that both these kids have autism. There has been question brought up lately as to weather Deze has autism or just ADHD. I am sick of being judged.
If you for one minute think that she is "simply" ADHD explain to me this. Explain the EXTREME need for sensory input. She bites herself daily, spins for HOURS on the swing, runs into walls over and over for the fell of it, does NOT chew on food so she chokes daily, stays up most the night and gets up in the middle of the night, is very far from potty trained or even starting to train, is hard to understand, does not have ANY concern for strangers, can literally break her own bones and not cry a tear. Eats things that are not food, including poop and toys....breaks toys, glass and drawing things (markers and crayons) just from pushing too hard for sensory input.
She runs infront of moving cars, would go home with anyone...and I have a very strong fear of someone taking advantage of her as she gets older.If she goes to a doctor she does not know, she bites them, or drops to the ground and hides under the chair. She has taken off from us in many stores. She has ran outside and stripped naked in the yard. She paints herself in mud or anything slimy every time she is allowed.
I often say that she would be awesome birth control to a teen. She does have autism, but we love her just the way she is....
To those out there doubting that she has ASD please understand that she copies people. If there are adults here to copy, she will do so and can appear normal for short periods of time.

Today Deze broke........

Two ornaments, one book, one Santa candle and one coffee cup! Its been an interesting day here. Deze has been entertained by my vacuum alot....She also stripped herself naked and was dancing around the house. When I told her to put something on, she put on....SOCKS! And then started to slid on the kitchen floor....I guess I should learn to be specific, you would think I would know this by now!

On a side note, we had a baby mole in the basement last night. Jackson was thrilled! He chased it down...and now we have to find it before it smells!

Gabe has been hard core focused on buzz and woody lately, like more then normal. He digs them out and carries them around for HOURS.
Tajia is going to be 7 yrs old on Tuesday! Time sure flies! Nomuken brings the snack for her class tomorrow...she has talked about this all weekend...

its been a whlie

So I guess its about time to let the world know we are still alive.That is assuming that someone out there still reads this. If not at least I can get my thoughts down.

First off our family has very much been put to the test of strength lately. One of those sink or swim type things. I am not going to air it all out on here....but to make a VERY long story short, Geromy has quit working for now to get things together and hopefully attend college. I went through surgery 2 weeks ago for my gall bladder. It was really bad, had gan green in it, ended up in the hospital overnight. Just now getting back to "normal" from that.

Deze is finally in a class at school that the teachers are willing to admit that she has "issues". They try to keep her going there with sensory things, although she has been biting the other kids lately. Good news is that her teacher knows its not a "normal 5yr old" thing to bite! She is VERY far from being potty trained. As in we can get her to pee in the potty about 3 times a week at this point.
On a good note, she is picking up on words, I just started to notice this about a week back. She is learning to read! Forget math, colors and shapes...she is going to read!

Gabe is sporting a red mowhawk. He loves it! And he allows me to cut his hair without sitting on him, literally! He is doing wonderful in math. Just last week he broke the SCHOOL RECORD!! He did 40 2 digits on tops, 2 on bottom, both adding and subtracting math problems in 1 minute 34 seconds! And he got them all right! I am so proud of him!
He is writing and spelling his name without help. Past that he is not a speller...and thats ok.

Tajia is reading at a 3rd grade level, in 1st grade. She is ahead of the class in nearly all subjects! Her 7th birthday is Tuesday....she is learning to communicate with Deze much better.In some ways I feel like she had to grow up way to fast, due to autism in the family, yet at the same time I know that she is still allowed to be a kid.

Nomuken is 6 now. She got her ears pierced for her bday! She is starting to listen better. We had to step up on time outs with her. And she has come along way in the last 2 weeks. She is actually starting to be less shy at school. She talks there now...although she still will not speak in front of the class, and she may never, but its not really something I am worried about!

We have a new dog named Scholar. He is a shar-pei. He is lots of fun, really smart too. He is lose all the time at 4 months old, fully potty trained for about a month now. He loves the kids!
Sadly our other dog, Tank was put down on August 1st. He had something called rage syndrome, he started to bite random people. Including the kids.

Christmas is 3 weeks away, we have lots of snow. Deze went sledding for the 1st time yesterday. She lasted longer then any of the other kids...the farther she got tossed off the sled the harder she laughed!
Signing off for now, pics to come in a while...I will try to keep this up to date more! Thank you for reading!

Summer time!

Summer time is here full force! Its nice and hot out and the kids are having fun in the pool almost daily. I would love to be able to take them to the lake, but with Deze who drinks the water, its not going to happen.
Between the school and some other people (not doctors) telling me that they think that Deze is normal, I was starting to doubt my own instincts for a while. I was starting to think that maybe I was just a bad mom, and didn't deal with her in the way I should....
Then it hit me. EVERY doctor, shrink and professional that has ever seen her sees that something is off within the first 3 min. The last one literally asked me "how the hell does the school NOT see this!" In the first 2 min of her seeing Deze. She works with GIRLS with autism.

On the outside she does appear normal. And she even mimics things enough she can fit in for a while. Till she starts to chew on her hands, or pull out her hair...or bit someone, scream and fall to the ground while scratching her face and head butting the floor. NOT normal things for a child that is 4yr 9 months old.

Dezire HAS autism. Dezire is NOT a normal kid. She is a hell of a lot of work. She needs to be watched around the clock. She sleeps 2-3 hours a night, and its not in a row. She bites herself, and other self harming things. She runs from me not knowing there is danger. She is a handful, but she is MINE, and I love her. I don't care what on lookers think. If they think that she is a "very mild" case, they can kiss it. Please people stop judging till you walk a mile....don't come into MY home and see her for 30 min and ASSume that you know what is going on. If you want to be a judge, where a black robe and a hammer thingie, then leave me alone!

In need of advice!

So last night we went to subway to eat. Deze, who is now 4yrs and 8 months old, choked on a salad, and threw up. This is very normal for her, she does not chew well at all....I have NO idea how to help her more. I remind her over and over to chew, I chop things up...and she still chokes, 4-5 times a week at least.
Anyone out there with any ideas?

Dezire ran away!

Let me first set the scene. Geromy was at work for the day, I had plans with a friend for the afternoon and the kids alone, I NEEDED a shower....We are talking day 3 of no shower!
So I turn on toy story 2, the kids all get glued to it....I sneak up and get a change of clothes and such for a shower...a VERY fast one. I turn on the water....and peak on the kids again, they are all fine. As I step into the shower I hear it, the front door unlock......fear goes thru me as I jump out and grab the robe.
I run to the living room and Deze is NO where to be seen. I go to the door and there she is taking off across the yard at full speed toward the busy road, already out of our fenced yard.
I took off after her and caught her less then 10 feet from the busy road. I get her back to the house, while she is screaming and biting me, and of course everyone within distance of hearing her scream is watching me.....
I ask her what she is doing....to which she smiles and says "NEED a slushie from target"
So I ask her, "were you going to target? and if you got there how would you pay?"
She replies "daddy work target, give Ray Ray money"

So she had this all figured out, except for the obvious safety of a 4.5 yr old child walking 2 miles alone in the rain for a slushie! I love her!!
Our friend then came over and sat with her while I got in my shower.....From now on I guess its night showers while Geromy is here or before 5am when Geromy leaves for work.....